A parent found support after causing a “drop out” at a children’s birthday party her daughter was attending, which earned her plenty of sympathy given the circumstances.
The now-viral Reddit post, titled “AITA for causing an exit [at] a [3-year-old’s] Birthday Party,” has been positively rated 12,200 times since it was posted on June 12th. Redditor @Preschoolpartydrama shared the post with the Am I the A**hole subreddit, revealing that her three-year-old was invited to a preschool classmate’s birthday party, which was held at an indoor playground.
According to Statista, a 2018 survey found that 29 percent of people spend more than $100 on a child’s birthday. Additionally, 31 percent spent between $51 and $100 and 24 percent between $31 and $50.
A birthday agenda
The original poster (OP) and her daughter arrived 10 minutes late as they got lost trying to find the spot, but they arrived at exactly the same time as two other families so it may have looked ‘planned’ .
The birthday child’s mother was “clearly irritated” because she missed a treasure hunt. No timeline was given, so the Redditor didn’t realize it would be a “big deal” if they were 10 minutes late or they “rushed more.”
The OP continued, “We all made sure our kids wished the birthday boy a happy birthday and [passed] him his presents, but when they were done, they immediately ran to the train ride. Turns out the mother wanted to organize a group photo shoot with the kids, so she was upset that they ran away.”
The kids were then given about 10 to 15 minutes to do whatever they wanted before having to follow a schedule they didn’t know they had. The children had two group rides, which also included a “photoshoot” before each ride.
Here, too, the children were allowed to play freely for about five to 10 minutes before they had to do another “photo shoot” with the party cake. Next, the parents had to take photos.
The OP revealed their country still had mandates for indoor masks, but they were told it was legal to take them off for the photos and were “ordered” to take them off.
Food & Dessert
Next they had the cake cutting and another round of more photos before the food was distributed to everyone.
Less than two hours had passed and they had four photo moments that took almost an hour to complete. “My daughter didn’t want to eat and I could see she was losing her composure,” the woman explained. “Especially since [there] was a selection of beautifully decorated desserts that weren’t offered to anyone at all, so I didn’t let them touch them.”
In a comment, the OP added, “They served food to the kids and offered cupcakes and cakes, but the fancy cookies on the dessert table [weren’t] an option. So there’s the dessert to eat and the dessert to display, but my daughter also wanted the dessert to display.”
She thought she should leave before they ruin the party as there had already been two meltdowns from two other children in the last 10 minutes and she said she didn’t want her daughter to be the third. However, the surgical daughter’s departure “triggered” her two friends to leave as well, which in turn led to even more children “demanding to go.”
“We tried to walk quietly, but my daughter’s closest friends saw us and started yelling,” the OP said. “I kind of expected it since the girls are in that inseparable phase where they have to do everything together.”
“The party was canceled at 30 [minutes]’ the OP wrote. “The mum is obviously mad at me and I agree that I ruined the party and I knew if my daughter left there was a chance I would start this snowball effect. And yes, I think it’s important not to expect society to cater to my child’s whims and it’s my job as a parent to make sure she’s behaved, but I think she’s done a great job , not to run away and do their own thing. “
The OP admitted that she found the party “stressful” and “not fun at all,” so she figured her kid probably felt the same way. “So am I one of those entitled mothers here?” She asked.
Redditor Responses: “Prepared for error”
Over 1,100 comments were received about the situation, and people fully support the OP for leaving the party when she did. One comment alone received 14,600 upvotes.
“NTA [not the a**hole]said the Redditor. “Probably an Insta mom looking for ‘the perfect picture.’ My 3 year old would have destroyed this party long before. You left to prevent a meltdown. Your child’s emotional needs come before a Pinterest mom’s photo shoot.”
The OP has clarified that the mother is not an influencer.
One Redditor was shocked and said, “Wow. I’ve had birthday parties and I’ve had three year olds and I’ve been to birthday parties and I’ve never demanded or engaged in that much effort. NTA. They wanted a photo album, not a party.”
Another user doesn’t think anyone can expect kids to follow “a complicated plan” by the time they’re three years old. “I just had my son’s sixth party and I basically let him and his friends run around until it was time for dinner,” the Redditor said. “Then they ran around a bit more until it was time for presents. Then they ran around until it was time for his friends to leave.”
While one user wondered who expects toddlers to “follow a schedule,” he added, “I might as well put 20 cats in a room and expect them to behave – it’s going to be extremely rare.”
One Redditor thinks having a schedule and photoshoots for three-year-olds is “totally doomed” and points out, “It’s pretty funny when I think of someone trying to herd a pack of three-year-olds. Leave her mad alone. The worst that could happen is they don’t invite you back, which would be a blessing.”
Some people slammed the host in the scenario. “NTA, the birthday mother is an AH [a**hole] for planning threenagers with an agenda that appears entirely in their mind that most adults would find challenging. What to actually what. LMAO.”
Another user mentioned that the woman “ruined” her own child’s birthday party. “NTA. As others have pointed out, mother’s expectations of three-year-olds were ridiculous,” they said.
news week asked Redditor @Preschoolpartydrama for comment.
This isn’t the only viral moment involving children. A woman was supported for banning her niece from the pool after a prank. A “racist” teacher was beaten for forcing a child to sit alone with “foreign” food. Also, a “pathetic” grandfather was slammed for “bullying” his granddaughter.